On Wednesday, April 21, 2010 I said good-bye to my best friend. I don't know alot of people who could say that their grandmother was their best friend, but mine was. I could talk to her about anything. We laughed, joked, cried, and even got mad at each other, but I always knew that she only wanted the best for me. She was mine and my moms shopping buddy. We might not have bought a single thing on the days we went shopping, but we always managed to have a good time.
The last week of my grandmother's life was pretty painful for everyone involved. She was taken to Jackson hospital on Wedneday afternoon, April 14, for an allergic reaction she had to an iron infusion. While she was there and being treated for the allergic reaction she started screaming with her right leg hurting. My grandmother had had several back surgeries and stuffered from neuropathy, so our thoughts that she was in pain from lying in the bed for so long. We did everything that she asked us to do to try and ease the leg pain. The nurse gave her some Morphine to try and ease the pain as well. Me and mom were there with her in the ER until 10pm that night. My mom called me around 9am Thurday, April 15 saying that she had just talkd to R.B. and he had called 911. When he tried to get Memaw out of bed her right leg just collasped. She could not put any weight on the right leg at all and it was cold as ice and was turning blue. Haynes ambulance bypassed Elmore Community Hospital and took her back to Jackson Hospital. She was immediatley assed and within an hour she was being prepared for surgery. The doctors explained to us that she had a blood clot in her leg-actually it was hgher up, but we didn't know that at the time. The vasuclar doctor preformed a triple "fem-to-fem" bypass, trying to get some blood flow to her right leg. The doctor told us then that she would require an amputation, but we would have to wait and see how much of the bypass would take. After surgery she was put in CCU. We called my Aunt Janice in Florida to tell her that she should probably be making her way here. We were able to see her around 3pm that afternoon and she was still telling us that her right leg hurt. Aunt Janice and Uncle Jimmy got here about 9pm and was able to see her and talk to her.
Friday afternoon, April 16, Aunt Janice's 60th birthday, Memaw was taken to surgery for an amputation. The doctor informed us that he may have to take to entire leg, all the way up to the hip. He told us of all the risk and that this would be his 4th case in his 26 years of practice. We were all very scared by this point. I prayed, harded than I think I have ever prayed. I prayed for comfort for Memaw and comfort for us, her family. I knew that if she made it through this surgery she would be fine. Within an hour and a half the doctor was calling the family to the door. He told us that she was stable, but on a ventalator. I thought, "Thank you God! She made it through!" The nurses told us that they would try to start turning the vent down the next morning. Debbie, my cousin from Florida made it around 6pm that night.
Saturday, April 17, Memaw was trying to respond to us. She would open her eyes and move her mouth, but no word on taking her off the vent. I remember telling Todd that the longer she stayed on the vent the hard it was going to be for her to come off. The only real change by this point was her left big toe had started to turn blue. We visited her at 10am, 2pm, 5pm, and 9pm everyday that she was in CCU. We talked to her, reminding her that we would not leave her side and that she was very loved. We never mentioned that her right leg was gone. We didn't want her to worry about that.
By Sunday, April 18, Memaw was having trouble with her kidneys, liver, intestines, and vascular systems. The nurses informed us that she was in fact in multiple organ system failure. The nurse told us that we would be meeting with a palative care doctor on Monday. We didn't know what to expect from him, but were told that he deals with end of life issues. My heart was in so much pain by this point. Not only am I witnessing my grandmother dieing, but I'm also witnessing, first hand, the pain that my mom and aunt were feeling. They were losing their mother. Oh my God, what would I do in their position? We were all terrified and scared at what the future would hold for Memaw.
Monday afternoon, April 19, mom, Aunt Janice, and R.B., met with Dr. Paul Strong. He informed them that there was not any hope for Memaw to recover. She was just too sick. Her body was in shock. The decision was made to remove Memaw's vent on Wednesday. She had been given every chance there was and she was just too sick. I know that was a tough decision for R.B., mom and Aunt Janice, but I have no doubt that it was the right one.
Tuesday, April 20, there really wasn't much change. She was producing very little urine, maybe 90-100cc-the normal is 1000cc per day. She wasn't responding to us at all anymore. She was so swollen from all of the fluid. We still visited her 4 times a day, or more if the nurse would let us. Tuesday night was awful for everyone. I don't think any of us slept.
Wednesday, April 21, was a very sad day. We knew what we were there to do and our hearts were very heavy. We all went in at the 10am visit. Dr. Strong came in with us and told us that there had not been any improvement in her condition. He told us that he would get the orders signed for the vent to be removed. We all told her how much we loved her and what a trooper she had been. I knew that she was tired, but God I wanted to keep her there just so I could touch her. Why did she have to go? We waited in the waiting room for the dreadful call. Around 11:30am-11:45am we were called back to her room. The vent had been removed and she was struggling. We all got to kiss her again and hold her hand. I thank God that her passing was quick and peaceful. She had the most restful expression on her face when she passed. She drew her last breathe at 12:10pm that day.
Now, the hard part has started-living life without her. I can't believe that Reily will never know her. He will never know the sweet, caring person that she was. He will never know my best friend. I have tried really hard to stay stong, but I do have my moments. It just doesn't seem real yet. I still feel like I should be going Saturday to pick her up to go shopping. I know that losing a loved one will get easier, but right now it is still freash and very painful. I do have hope in knowing that I will see her again one day!
"Be good and don't bring home any shoes." -R.B.
Until next time...
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